Building rather than leveraging relationships

‘Building rather than leveraging relationships’ - *Marshall Goldsmith & Sally Helgesen say this is the Number 4 challenge holding women back.

Our thoughts:

We are guilty of this one ourselves!

At least we were.

We are better now at reaching out and we’re so grateful to so many of you who have helped us.

Here’s the pattern we’re talking about though:

We build wonderful, trust-filled relationships.

We nurture and take care of them.

And we never, ever, leverage these relationships – somehow it feels like ‘using’ or ‘taking advantage’.

Yet, we don’t hesitate for a second if the help is for someone else – we’re on the phone in jig time asking for advice, resources, support on behalf of a friend, a colleague, or, sometimes, on behalf of someone we’ve just met.

And here’s the thing – how do we feel when someone asks us for help?

Are we not delighted to provide information, connections, resources?

Is it not a sign that the person asking values our advice, reckons we’ll have the insights, connections, or capacity to help?

And when someone asks you for help – give a generous expansive response –

‘Of course I will, if I can at all’ is my favourite response – and I mean it.

There’s always some help I can give, even if it’s purely listening – often the best gift of all.

So, we suggest get out there – start asking for small favours, opinions, advice, and observe how people respond – You’ll be pleasantly surprised.

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*Marshall Goldsmith & Sally Helgesen's book, 'How Women Rise: Breaking the 12 Habits Holding You Back' is worth reading over and over.

We're sharing a series of reflections on their 12 Habits based on our own experience; hope we spark some ideas for you!